I Remember When You Broke My Soul

Torn up with anguish that you're leaving back home and my heart can't stand the distance increasing between our shared love and shared bodies. I recall upon the moment we first met.you came to pick me up for the first time on our first blind date in your blue Chevy extended cab.the sound of the doorbell sent chills through my bones and I leave my stomach at the top of the stairs racing to the door raising my heart beats. You first see me in my little flowy, light brown, braided strap sun dress and my knee high rubber muddin boots. Not common for a first date, but at the time it was my preference. You standing before me appeared strong, dominant, confident but so inviting and warm. That was the moment we became ''we.'' Time continues and we share memories, vacations, teaching me how to drive a stick shift, birthdays, holidays, families, friends, we shared each other with each other. Then your job was done and contract completed and you were shipped home after our future plans were verbally set in stone. Thanksgiving we planned for myself to drive to your home you lived before you made a new home with me. I'm denied leave, then put on CQ and call you to cancel my trip. At the end of my 24 hour CQ shift I'm released the rest of the holiday, so I raced to the home we shared during our time in the easiest relationship. Being up 24 consecutive hours I drove to you, 12 hours ands 54 minutes all the time calling you for my arrival. No response. I continue my trip, tiring as each minutes expires. I remember back upon the first time you had told me loved me and in a day dream I zone out. We both had surprises for one another coincidentally at the same time. As we presented them to one another we both realized how much we loved one another. The item we bought were the same on in different versions. A male style and a style he'd bought for me, the woman's version. I arrive at your home too far from the warmth of my bed. It appears as no one is home as the snow began to fall again after only taking a 15 minute break. In a sudden, my lungs freeze as if the snow is being inhaled directly to my inner organs. My heart slows, vision blurs, my mouth dries to the touch, silence struck. The silence broke as the heart barely beating by a frozen stiffness cracks resulting into the loudest heart break on my inside. All is still silent on the outside of my body. I dare let you see the salt stinging wetness gather in my eyes as I glare at you and your secret lover perched on the bed built strong for passionate love making with me. Spun up and cozy in the winter month blankets that we shared in our home. The wrong woman's hair spread lazily on the soft pillow meant for my head to lay upon. No words uttered from my puckered lips holding back the agonizing pain of a rusty blade being twisted sideways while stuck into chest. 37 hours now of no sleep and now it's the last thing my body will allow itself to do. I will not recall on time spent with you after my regrettable return after your secret lover had departed, for the memories of it are still so frightening and painful. These days I have forgiven for those times you hurt me so, but yonder days I'll never forget the time you broke my soul. Buenos Noches my lil chickens, till I feed you another night.